Fated
by tebrighteyes
Summary: Roxas is your average rich kid whose been imprisoned and repeatedly drugged by his older brother Cloud. When he realizes Cloud may have an alterative motive he goes on the run where he meets Sora and begins to uncover dark secrets about himself. Post KHII
1. Chapter 1

Fated

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts

Summary: Roxas is just your average rich kid whose been repeatedly drugged and virtually imprisoned by his older brother Cloud. When he realizes Cloud may have an alterative motive Roxas goes on the run where he meets Sora and begins to uncover dark secrets about himself that could change the world. Post KH II

Pairings: None at the moment although the story is centered around Roxas and Sora.

Chapter 1

Roxas jerked awake when he realized the car had stopped moving. He tried to sit up, hoping to find a clue on where he was but the bile rose to his throat at the movement and he quickly laid back down. He was sprawled out on the backseat of the car, head on his arm, vision blurry and he blinked a few times in an attempt to clear it, noticing he was alone. Axel was gone.

Roxas's breathing hitched as he felt panic twist inside of him, his thoughts jumping to what if Axel had left him, just walked out and then Roxas tried to force himself to calm down, tried to rationalize it. Over the past couple of weeks they had made several pit stops rather it was just to stalk up on gas or grab something to eat, usually at a drive threw but Roxas had always been with him or Axel at least told him when he was leaving, always said he'd be back in just a few minutes. _So that had to be it right. _Axel must have said something and Roxas must have mumbled an affirmative in his sleep, or at least he hoped. Plus he didn't think Axel would just abandon his car.

Feeling a bit calmer, Roxas slowly picked his head up from off his arm, trying to get a better look at his surroundings, they were off the highway and in what looked like a nearly deserted parking lot of a run down diner which was a discolored pink with the paint flaking off, windows scratched, and the outermost wall had a very large dent. There weren't any other buildings as far as he could tell just the diner and it was still bright outside but the sky was beginning to darken so Roxas guessed it was in the early evening. It was hard to get used to the sky, still felt strange looking at it compared to the cloudy void that was Midgar.

Roxas wanted to call out, to see if Axel was somewhere in hearing range but his mouth felt dry, his throat fused together and he doubted he could speak much over a whisper, a sudden sharp pain ran behind his eyes, making him nearly cry out in a dry and voiceless scream, his body then convulsing and Roxas dug his fingers into the red torn seat until it passed, leaving him gasping for air.

He'd been feeling increasingly sick, starting out as only a dull throb in the back of his head so he hadn't thought anything of it but it had grown into something so sharp and piercing that it nearly brought tears to his eyes, now to the point where his whole body ached, where he could barely move, couldn't keep from trembling, couldn't even hold his limbs still, then there was the nausea, and he wasn't sure but he thought he had a fever, his skin felt too hot to him. Axel had asked him a few times if he was alright but Roxas was afraid of slowing them down and each time replied he was fine and the redhead had let it go, not really seeming to be concerned either way.

Roxas had no idea what was wrong with him, he'd never been sick before or at least that he could remember, he'd never even had the chance to get sick, hardly ever being around dirt and having so little contact with others except for when he was out with Kairi but even when she or Naminé had gotten sick, which was hardly at all, he was never allowed around them.

Roxas was so caught up on trying to figure out what was wrong with him, on trying to swallow the pain back that he barely noticed when the car door opened and Axel sat down, leaning tiredly against the steering wheel but he wasn't alone there was a girl with him and she climbed into the passengers' seat, she was pretty Roxas thought with long legs, a pointed face, glinting blue eyes, and short blonde hair but with bangs that stuck up from the side of her head and reminded him of an insect's antenna. She was showing a lot of skin, wearing blue jean shorts that only reached her mid thigh and a glittery pink halter top.

Axel said something in such a low tone that Roxas couldn't hear but the girl laughed giddily, mumbling something back.

"Axel" Roxas tried to call but his voice came out hoarse and thick and Axel or the girl didn't look back, Axel either not hearing him or choosing to ignore him.

"Axel" Roxas tried again, putting more force behind the name, making his throat burn and his voice hitch but at least it was loud this time.

"What?!" The redhead snapped, jerking his head around, green eyes flashing toward the blond.

Roxas didn't know what he wanted to say, had just wanted Axel's attention but soon realized he didn't have to say anything as the girl turned in her seat folding her arms on top of the headrest, placing her chin on her hands, staring at him and smiling almost mockingly. "Axel, why do you have a kid in your backseat?"

Axel ran a hand through his spikes and groaned. "Long story."

The girl's smile broadened as she hummed an affirmative. "He's so cute. How old is he?"

"I'm sixteen." Roxas snapped.

"Right," She drawled as if Roxas hadn't spoken, eyes flickering to Axel. "Sixteen isn't that illegal or something?"

"You know Larxene? For some reason I really don't feel like going into it."

Larxene, at least he had a name now, laughed high and piercing. Roxas instantly didn't like it and repressed the urge to shift away from her as she turned her attention back to him. "So what's your name cutie?"

Roxas glanced at Axel, wondering if he should answer or not before the redhead spoke for him. "It's Roxas. Roxas this is Larxene…" Axel trailed off as if not knowing how to finish. "She's my friend." He said at last.

Larxene looked as if she was considering something for a moment before shrugging it off, turning back around. "Yeah, whatever so if you still want to do that thing…"

"Sure," Axel droned. "Hey Rox you mind waiting here for a couple of hours?"

Roxas felt the panic come back. "What?"

"I have something I need to take care of. Wait here and I'll be back to pick you up."

Roxas tried to sit up again, relieved when he actually managed it. "How do I know you'll come back?"

Axel shrugged. "I guess you don't."

"That's not good enough." Roxas hissed. "Do you think I went through all this just so you can walk out on me?"

"Relax," Axel replied, leaning back in his seat. "I wouldn't leave you out here."

Roxas shifted forward, barely managing to hide a wince at the movement, thrusting a hand between Axel and Larxene. "Half of what I gave you, I want it back."

Larxene glanced from Roxas to Axel, obviously confused. "Half of what?"

"Money" Axel replied easily.

Larxene snickered. "Wow Axel, taking money from a kid even for you that's an all time low."

"It's not his," Axel said without bothering to look at her. "He stole it from his brother."

"His brother?"

"Right, his brother's completely loaded. They live in this huge house. I swear it's like something one of those big high and mighty ShinRa officials would have or something one of the president's body guards would have Turks or whatever..."

"Well if that's the case," Larxene said sweetly. "Then tell me Axel what the hell is he doing with you?"

"Easy really, I help Roxas escape his insane brother and he provides the money."

Larxene pressed her lips together but she didn't comment, staring straight at Roxas. "Where are your parents?"

Roxas didn't understand why Axel was talking to Larxene so freely, after they'd been running for over two weeks, hadn't stayed in one place for more then a few minutes, and spoke to others as little as possible. Did Axel not think Larxene was a threat or did he really just trust her that much? Somehow, she didn't seem very trustworthy to him, so maybe Axel had another motive. "Dead."

"I see," Larxene hummed. "So who's your brother?"

"Don't answer that." Axel cut in before Roxas even had the chance to open his mouth.

"There's more going on here isn't there?" Larxene drummed her fingers against her chin. "You know how much trouble you can get in for harboring a runaway Axel?"

Roxas could see Axel tense but he ignored her, lifting an arm and tapping the door with the back of his hand. "Alright enough of this we need to get going and Roxas get out of the car."

Roxas felt something tear through his stomach and it suddenly felt harder to breath. He tried to not let it show by swallowing heavily, folding his arms over his stomach, and leaning against his door. "No, I told you to give me-"

"And I told you before you came with me, it was either my rules or nothing. You're not the one in danger of being arrested. Besides I'm not an ATM machine. You don't carry that much around with you."

Larxene grinned, shifting closer to Axel, her eyes shinning. "Just how much are we talking about anyway?"

"Larxene, drop it. Roxas if you don't get out of the car right now-"

"I'm sick." Roxas choked out in a last desperate effort. He could feel something rush into his throat, swallowed again.

Axel ran his eyes over him, disinterestedly. "You look fine to me."

As if on cue Roxas rushed to open the car door, heaving violently onto the parking lot, expelling everything he'd eaten in the last few days, choking and gagging.

Axel sighed, closing his eyes and massaging the bridge of his nose. "Its irony isn't it?"

"You know Axel," Larxene supplied, watching Roxas from over her shoulder. "I think he's sick."

"Thank you Larxene." Axel got out from the car, nearly slamming the door.

Roxas was still gasping, half in shock and half disgusted with himself, he'd actually just thrown up. This wasn't supposed to happen to him, this never happened to him, he wasn't supposed to be sick. He felt suddenly terrified, considering for the first time that maybe something really was wrong with him.

Then Roxas felt long fingers close tightly around his forearm as Axel pulled him out from the backseat until he was leaning against the frame of the door, Axel standing in front of him, the redhead's hand leaving his arm to place the back of his hand against his forehead. Roxas watched him for a reaction, feeling dread tear inside of him when Axel immediately frowned.

"How long have you been feeling like this?" Axel asked almost softly.

"A few days."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want to slow us down." Roxas hesitated, that was the truth but now he was partially relieved Axel had found out. He was sure the redhead would know what was wrong with him, or at least know something he could take to stop the pain. It was like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he found himself telling Axel everything in a rush. "It really started almost right after we left, but I've only been feeling this bad for a few days and now everything hurts, I feel sick all the time, and I can't stop shaking. Do you know what's wrong?"

"I have no idea." Off Roxas's worried look, Axel quickly added, "I wouldn't worry about it though, it's probably just the flu or something."

"Really?" Roxas asked hopefully. "Is the flu supposed to hurt this much?"

"It's not great." Axel let his hand fall from Roxas's forehead and onto his shoulder. "Hey, why don't you try to eat something alright? I promise I'll be back in two hours tops."

"Alright," Roxas agreed hesitantly, "But if you leave me out here and something happens then I'm going to track you down and make your life a living nightmare for all eternity."

Axel chuckled, squeezing his shoulder before producing a large black wallet from his torn blue jeans, fishing out a few spare bills. "I'll give you something to eat with."

"I don't need it."

Axel shrugged. "You sure?"

"Yeah," Roxas dug into his own pocket, holding up a strip of blue plastic, forcing a triumphant smile. "I've got Cloud's credit card."

The redhead froze, before narrowing heated green eyes, gritting his teeth, and tearing the credit card out of Roxas's hands. "Dammit Roxas! Don't you know anything!?"

Roxas looked up confused, had thought Axel would be pleased he'd taken it, didn't understand why he was reacting like this. "What's wrong?"

Axel held the credit card in front of him, desperately looking as if he wanted to rip apart the next living thing. "What's wrong? Your fucking idiot brother can track us with this!"

Roxas felt his blood run cold, clenched his eyes shut, breathing sharply. He couldn't speak, couldn't move, the realization worse then anything he'd been through so far.

"Did you use this?!"

"Once. Just once."

"When? Where exactly did you use it?!"

"I don't know!" Roxas shouted, tears of frustration forming in his eyes. "A couple of days ago. We were just some place, you were off talking to someone, and I used it to get something to eat. I swear that's all I did!"

"Alright, alright." Axel raised a hand to his temple, breathing deeply, trying to calm himself. "It's alright," He mumbled more to himself. "You're sure you didn't use it for anything else?"

"No, I swear that was it."

Axel nodded slowly. "Okay, don't worry about it. I'll take care of it."

"Hey" Larxene called, leaning her head out the window. "What's going on?"

"Nothing" Axel shouted back, palming his wallet and shoving the few bills into Roxas's hands. "Use this." Without another word, he walked back to his car, quickly closing the door, reaching for his keys.

It occurred to Roxas then that Axel had everything, all the money he and Kairi had stolen from Cloud, the few items he'd been able to take from home, and now the credit card. There was no reason for the redhead to come back. Roxas felt the familiar sensation of panic start to surface, he was being left alone, abandoned. But strangely, the concept didn't bother him as much as he thought it would and he found he was only focused on one thing.

"Axel wait!" Roxas called, running to the car and shoving his hand through the window, gripping the steering wheel.

Axel sighed. "What now?"

"There's this capsule in the glove box. I need it."

Axel looked blank, raising an eyebrow. "Capsule?"

"You really are a moron Axel. You know that right?' Larxene commented, opening the glove box and digging through it. "What do you usually put in capsules?" She soon took out an orange plastic tube, holding it out in front of her face. "Is this what you want cutie?"

"Y-yeah that's it." Roxas leaned forward, hand outstretched.

"Really now?" Larxene grinned, holding it out of his reach and shaking it, making the few pills inside rattle.

Axel grabbed it from her. "What the hell? I've never seen this before."

"Because you never check the glove box," Roxas said absently. "Why else do you think I'd put it there? I can't trust you remember?"

"I'm wounded," Axel squinted his eyes as if trying to read the capsule's non existent label. "So what is this anyway? You taking medication Rox?"

"No, and it's nothing I just need it."

Axel frowned, looking as if he was debating on saying something else before sighing and hastily handing it to him. "Fine, we're out of here."

Roxas backed away from the car, clutching the tube protectively against his chest. Axel didn't even glance at him, the car immediately speeding out of sight and Roxas found himself alone, for the first time ever he was alone, without Kairi, without Axel. He wondered if he should feel terrified or excited but he was only numb, in too much pain to focus on really anything.

Roxas started toward the diner, his knees stiff, and his muscles protesting as a sharp pain shot through his legs. He was shivering badly, suddenly very cold, couldn't walk straight. Somehow, he made it to the door, pulling it open, the inside was small, dark, and smelled mostly of grease, making him almost sick again.

Staggering to a bar stool, he sat down heavily, letting his whole upper body collapse against the grimy wooden counter, resting his head against his arms and breathing deeply until his body stopped involuntarily jerking. Forcing himself to sit up, Roxas dumped out his remaining pills, thumbing through them, touching each one, noting with a sinking sensation that he only had seven left. He'd been trying to ration them by only taking two a day instead of the usual five, he'd even skipped the last few days but after these, they were gone and he didn't know where Cloud bought them from. Maybe Axel might know where to pick some up. Roxas made a mental note to tell him if he ever came back. Cloud said they were for his heart, so that had to be common, there had to be other places to get them, the thought made him feel slightly better.

"Do you need a menu?"

Roxas looked up, seeing a young girl behind the counter, staring at him expectantly.

"No, uhhh…just water."

The girl's eyes strayed to the pills but she didn't comment, twirling a strand of chestnut colored hair around her finger. "You sure? Nothing else?"

Roxas was about to refuse again but paused. Axel had said to try to eat something. Just the thought of eating made his stomach churn but maybe it would help with the flu or whatever he had and then he remembered once when Kairi had gotten a fever, Tifa had made her soup. Tifa always knew the right thing to do, the right thing to say but Roxas immediately tore the thought from his mind, not wanting to think about her. "Soup maybe?"

"We only have tomato."

Roxas managed a smile. "That's fine."

The girl nodded before shortly returning with his order and leaving him alone. Roxas grabbed five of the pills, more desperate to finally be taking them then he realized, cupping them in his hand, tilting his head back, pushing them into his mouth, draining about half the water. It left him trying to catch his breath but he did feel a little less shaky and the throbbing in his head didn't seem as intense. With mild relief, Roxas pocketed them and turned his attention to the soup, carefully taking a spoonful. The warmth of it felt nice but it was thick, slightly salty, tasted acidic, and hard to swallow.

Almost as soon as he'd gotten it past his lips, his stomach left as if it had lurched into his throat and he gagged, running for the bathroom, barely making it before he heaved into the toilet, throwing up mostly bile, and the pills he'd just taken. Roxas fisted a hand mostly annoyed he'd just wasted the pills but all he could do was kneel on the cold and dirt splattered tiled floor until the trembling had stopped and he didn't think he was going to throw up again. The pills wouldn't have dissolved yet and for a moment Roxas thought about fishing them out of the toilet but dismissed it, revolted at the idea, and flushed them before he had the chance to think of it again.

He climbed to his feet, making his way out of the bathroom but as soon as he entered the dinning room he felt as if the whole world was spinning, he was wavering, wasn't even sure if he was right side up anymore, and tightly gripped the counter to keep himself from falling, putting however much money Axel had given him by his soup bowl before stumbling outside, only wanting to be out of the diner.

He was able to make it around back, hopefully out of the way enough where the few people that there were wouldn't notice him, before collapsing against the muted pink wall. Roxas felt as if he was being torn apart from the inside, his head about to split open, his every nerve on fire. He dry heaved, curling onto the sidewalk, holding back a sob as hot tears formed in his eyes, everything distorted and blurry. His eyes falling shut as he tried to fight the dizziness before everything faded to black.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Roxas."

Someone was saying his name, shaking him, fingers digging into his upper arms. He was so tired, his eyelids felt glued shut, his head hurt, and all he wanted was sleep, tell whoever it was to leave him alone.

"Roxas!"

The grip tightened, the shaking grew harder, the voice more frantic. He tried to shift away, tried to say something but all he managed was a groan.

"Dammit Roxas wake up."

He realized there was a stinging ache at the back of his neck and shoulders as he felt himself being moved, propped up against something hard, his head limply rolling backwards but at least the shaking had stopped. He forced his eyes open, seeing nothing but a whirlpool of obscured color, the pain, the trembling, and nausea hitting all at once.

He was confused, didn't understand what was going on but he could tell he was outside, the sky was dark by now, and even though there was a warm nighttime breeze , he was freezing cold. He wanted to let his head fall onto his knees, wrap his arms around his legs until everything just went away but then he caught a flash of silver chains. Someone was kneeled beside him with a black jacket, and a mass of red hair, followed by the all too familiar scent of leather and lighter fluid. Everything came rushing back.

"Axel?" He choked out weakly.

Axel sighed. "Hey kid, it's me."

"I didn't think you were coming back." His throat still felt dry and his words came out slurred. He gritted his teeth against the sour taste in his mouth.

"I told you I would," Axel said offhandedly. "What are you even doing out here?" He paused, smirking. "Getting drunk again?"

"Drunk?" Roxas repeated slowly, wondering why Axel would be asking him that. It was so hard to think. Everything felt hazy, far away. "No…"

Axel snorted. "I was joking."

Roxas rubbed at his eyes, trying to focus himself more, make his voice stop wavering. "I don't know. I think I passed out."

"Passed out?" Axel frowned, reaching one hand out, gripping Roxas's jaw, turning his head, narrowing his eyes in concentration. "You just don't pass out Rox."

"Maybe it was because of the flu?"

Axel let his hand fall away, seeming to consider it, before looking off to the side. "No the flu wouldn't…"

It took Roxas a minute to realize Axel wasn't talking to him and he followed the redhead's gaze until his eyes landed on Larxene, standing a few feet away. He winced, not being able to completely cover up his uneasiness around her, wondering why he hadn't even noticed her until now. She looked somewhere between board and frustrated, her arms crossed, quickly scowling at Axel. "Don't look at me."

Axel didn't comment, turning back to him. "Rox, what exactly happened?"

"I was…" Roxas trailed off, remembering what he'd wanted to tell Axel. "I think it's because I'm not taking enough pills."

"Pills?" Axel asked skeptically. "You mean the ones from earlier?"

Roxas nodded, pulling the capsule out from his pocket, placing it in Axel's hand. "These were all I could get before we left. I thought you might know where to get some more."

Axel undid the lid, letting the pills roll onto his palm. "What is this?"

"Heart medication," Roxas answered. "Or at least that's what Cl-" Axel jerked his head up, making Roxas just catch the slip. "My brother always said and that our parents died because of heart failure but I was the only who inherited the defect so he doesn't have to take them."

"Of course he doesn't. This isn't heart medication." Axel said abruptly, recapping them, throwing the tube to Larxene. "Here, you're better at this stuff."

Larxene fingered them, holding them up to eye level. "Strange, There isn't a brand name or anything else on this and it's not…" She trailed a finger against her bottom lip. "I don't know what it is."

"Roxas," Axel's attention was completely focused on him, voice low and hard. "How many of these do you take?"

"Five a day, but I've been trying to ration them, skipping days."

"How long have you been taking them?"

"I'm not sure, since I was about eight I think."

Axel cursed before moving away from him, fisting a hand against his forehead, pacing the narrow strip of the parking lot. "This is NOT what I need right now."

Larxene just laughed. "The flu Axel? You sure had that one figured out."

Roxas's eyes flickered between Axel and Larxene. They had obviously gotten something he hadn't and he only found himself growing irritated that he was being left out. "What is it, what's wrong?"

"You're not sick Rox." Axel paused, tearing the capsule back out of Larxene's hands. "You're addicted to whatever the hell this is. You're going through withdrawal."

"What's withdrawal?"

Larxene choked back her laughter. "It's when you've taken something for so long like a drug that you become dependent on it and when it's suddenly taken away your body has a hard time coping." Larxene rubbed her arm, looking sympathetic before smiling again. "Then you end up going through these types of symptoms but you shouldn't worry as you can only die from it in the most extreme cases." She suddenly gasped, voice brimming with mock concern "But then I've never seen anyone suffer from it this badly so maybe-"

"Larxene shut up!" Axel snapped.

Roxas was beginning to feel lightheaded. The haze was building, thickening, black spots forming at the edge of his vision. He fought it, trying to stay conscience, trying to think. For everything Cloud kept from him or was capable of, Roxas had a hard time believing his older brother would do something that could potentially poison him but with everything that had happened, he could feel the doubt building. "No you don't understand," He said mostly to reassure himself. "Cloud wouldn't-"

"Cloud, you mean Cloud Strife?" Laxene rose an eyebrow in sudden realization, snapping her fingers. "The delivery boy, who owns the I do everything business? I knew you looked familiar."

"Familiar?" Roxas forced himself to stand, feeling uneasy while on the ground. It left everything spinning again, as the black spots threatened to over take him. He leaned entirely back against the wall to remain upright.

"There was an article about you in the front page of the newspaper cutie," Larxene continued. "Along with some blurred photograph. They had this huge reward out for any information."

"No!" Roxas's legs failed to support his weight anymore and he collapsed to the ground, his whole body convulsing, feeling as it wanted to turn inside out. He clutched at his arms, fingernails digging into his skin, trying to keep from sobbing, trying to find his voice. "You can't…you can't tell anyone."

"Oh" Larxene's eyes were shinning, a small smile tugging at her lips as if she was enjoying watching him like this. "And why couldn't I?"

"Because you wouldn't Larxene," Axel said irritably, walking back over to Roxas and kneeling. "Unless you want to break our deal and everything else that goes along with it."

Larxene turned her head away, impatiently walking back to the car. "I was only saying."

Roxas glanced up at Axel as soon as Larxene's footsteps faded. "She wouldn't… she wouldn't right?"

"No, don't worry, Larxene and I have know each other since we were just kids. She wouldn't try anything and even if she did I have too much hanging over her head for her to get away with it."

Roxas could hear himself breathing. It felt suddenly hard to even hold his own head up, everything only a swirl of color. "She said…she said that withdrawal…that you can…" It was hard to continue and he had to swallow, his mouth and throat dry and burring, hoping Axel had understood him.

"You're going to be fine Rox," Axel said with a slight trace of humor in his voice. "Larxene likes to screw with anyone she can. Don't listen to her."

Roxas barely registered Axel putting his hand on his shoulder, the redhead trying to get his attention, make him think about something else. "Hey, want to know where I was?"

"Where?"

"We went to see this guy Larxene knows. His name's Marluxia. He's got connections and anyway I was able to get us a motel room for the night. What do you think about that huh? Be able to sleep in a real bed for once."

Roxas forced a smile. "Sounds good."

Axel's arm came around his back, shifting him. "I'm going to lift you up okay?"

Roxas couldn't even form a reply before Axel rose easily with him. He clamped his mouth shut against the onslaught of nausea and staggering pain, refusing to let himself make a sound. It passed after a few agonizing seconds, leaving his body limp and heavy, his head falling against Axel's shoulder. He didn't think he could move even if he had wanted too so he didn't even try, letting Axel take them wherever.

He vaguely recalled being placed in the backseat, everything fading in and out of black. He thought he might have felt the car moving but he wasn't sure.

0o0o0o0

_Anything could happen… _

_Roxas could still hear those three words echo through his head, in a strong and deep voice. They made him twist with rage, made his heart leap into his throat. He knew the voice, heard it somewhere before, could nearly see an aged and tired face, somehow knowing he hated, loathed even whoever it was. They had hurt him, ripped him open until there was nothing left._

_Roxas, I doubt you can hear me but… I am sorry._

_Then all he knew was he was in some strange white room, the ceiling and walls nearly non existent, standing over Kairi as she laid sprawled on the floor, a glinting, metallic, and rainbow colored key beside her from where it had rolled away from her limp fingers. Her eyes were partially open, glazed over, her mouth open as if she'd been screaming. Blood was matted through her hair, smeared across her face, her neck broken. All he could do was stare. He didn't know how she'd gotten that way, what had happened. All he knew was that she wasn't dead because Kairi couldn't die. Monsters from other worlds could die, heartless and nobodies could fade away, But never the heroes, never Kairi._

Roxas had woken up gasping, throwing the covers off. He couldn't get back to sleep, couldn't shake the dream. It was like he'd been watching through someone else's eyes but it had felt real, more real then anything. He pressed his hand against the cool glass of his window. It was pitch black outside but if he concentrated he could see the faint outline of stars. This was nothing more then a prison he couldn't escape from. He hated his life, he hated Cloud. There had to be something more then this, more then feeling like he was only half alive. Cloud was keeping something from him. He could feel it, feel the truth, longing for it and dreading it at the same time.

Roxas thudded his head against the window, drained and frustrated. He wanted to scream, to break the glass, wanted to cry, and he squeezed his eyes shut, instead turning his bedside lamp on, roughly grabbing a book he'd been reading earlier, nearly ripping it open. Anything to get his mind off things, off the dream, concentrate on something else.

His door flew open only minutes later and Roxas didn't even have to look up to know who it was. Cloud, Tifa, and Naminé always knocked first. Kairi was the only one who barged through. "Roxas you'll never guess who showed up at track practice!"

Roxas glanced up at her. Kairi had either hand on the side of the doorway, leaning forward on her toes. He had to remind himself that she wasn't covered in her own blood, her eyes weren't dull and lifeless, her body wasn't broken and twisted. She was very much alive, standing in front of him. "Kairi it's the middle of the night."

"Yeah, I know," Kairi said carelessly, glancing at Roxas's window and back to him again. "But that's not important right now. Anyway guess."

"Marlene." He said automatically.

"No, it's no one you would have met and Marlene doesn't even like track."

He sighed. "Selphie."

"No."

"Penelo."

"No."

"Rikku."

"Getting closer."

"I don't know Kairi."

"Yuna! She just showed up and the coach paired us up together. I never know how fast she was. She almost beat me. Then when we were back in the locker room she told me she only tried out to get Tidus to notice her."

"So?"

"So, Yuna likes Tidus!" Kairi blurted, "And remember when I told you how I would always see Tidus looking at her when he thought no one was watching? So I had to tell Tidus what Yuna said…"

Roxas had learned long ago how to tune Kairi out and he focused his attention back on his book, turning a page. Kairi did this often, describing in detail what her day had been like, what her friends had done. Until Roxas felt like he was apart of their lives. He knew everyone she hung out with, their names, what color their hair was, their favorite thing to do on the weekends but he'd never meet any one of them. Marlene was the exception but Roxas was still trapped when Kairi and Naminé weren't.

Kairi was never home, getting back this late was routine for her. Roxas knew a large part of it was because she wanted to distance herself from what was going on right in front of her eyes, what Cloud was doing to him, when she was virtually powerless to stop it. He could see the regret shinning in her eyes each time she talked to him like this, each time she searched her mind, giving him every last detail she could think of, acting as his window to the outside world. Roxas couldn't fault her for any of it. She was his friend, his best friend, they had always just clicked, and he couldn't imagine what his life would be like without her.

"Tidus was so excited," Kairi continued. "So he told me to invite Yuna to this party he's throwing tonight…" Kairi crossed her arms and frowned. "Only I don't want to go. I hate Tidus's parties. Half the guys always end up getting drunk and even then someone always spikes something until it turns out to be nothing more then a complete waste of time."

"So don't go." Roxas replied tiredly.

Kairi looked as if she was considering it, biting her lip in thought. "I would but I have to make sure Tidus and Yuna at least talk to each other." She rolled her eyes. "You know I've told you how completely hopeless Tidus can be."

"So go."

"Thanks for the help Roxas," Kairi mocked scowled, leaning against the doorframe. "I'm really sure what I should do now."

Roxas shrugged. "The party has to be at least half over by now anyway. You should probably just stay out of it. What about Cloud? Does he know?"

"Actually," Kairi said absently. "I told Dad I might not even get home at all tonight and he said…and I quote," She lifted her hands up, wagging her fingers. "Fine, just don't get too hammered and don't bring this up to your mother. You're still under aged." Kairi turned her head away a bit bitterly. "I really don't get him at all. All my friend's dads want them to be home by at least ten, mine waves and hands me the car keys."

Roxas could see her stiffen and she suddenly looked far away. He kept silent, not knowing what to say to her and preferring to stay out of anything Cloud did. But when Kairi turned back to him she was smiling, her blue-violet eyes glinting in the dim light of the room. "Hey Roxas, come with me."

He froze, feeling his mouth go dry. She had said it so casually as if she was commenting on her favorite movie, not breaking years of carefully guarded rules, not suggesting something that wasn't supposed to happen. Roxas wondered if it really was that easy. He'd never thought about just sanding up and leaving and as much as he wanted it he was still in shock. Confinement was almost all he knew and to finally break out made a pressure well up in his chest, leaving him struggling to breathe. Kairi didn't seem to notice, watching him expectantly, waiting for an answer. "Cloud would never let me." He stated the obvious.

"Dad's not even here. Not like he's ever here, doing top secret motorcycle stuff or whatever."

"What about Mom she-"

"She doesn't get home until really late," Kairi countered. "And when she does she's usually so drained she goes straight to bed. Just lock your door in case she decides to check on you. She probably wouldn't think anything of it. There's no one that…well, I think the ice princess is upstairs but she's so oblivious and she'd never say anything anyway."

Ice princess was how Kairi always refereed to Naminé. Even though the two were twins they weren't close and completely opposite. Kairi was the athlete, outgoing, popular, loud, staying out to all hours of the night but somehow still managing to be at the top of her class. If Kairi shut herself out then Naminé shut herself in, preferring to stay in her own private studio, drawing and hardly speaking to anyone. She was delicate like some princess in a tower.

_He remembered once when he and Kairi were running through the hallways and he had stopped breathlessly by Naminé's door. "Hey Naminé want to play Mario Kart with us?"_

_She turned from her painting. She had the strangest eyes, pastel blue that could speak without words, brimming with emotion and pain, standing out against her washed out appearance. Roxas always felt as if she were looking right through him. "You were never supposed to exist, Roxas."_

_He had just stood there, too hurt to say anything but it had struck something in him, a sense of truth and denial, as if he knew she'd once said the same thing to him before. He'd been trapped then too, in a world that wasn't real with phantom friends he couldn't remember the names of. It went along with the voice, the voice he hated and three words that sent chills down his spine. Anything could happen… His thoughts went hazy, it was so hard to think, to remember. Then Kairi had gotten his attention again and Roxas since then had avoided Naminé whenever he could. Naminé hadn't seemed to care._

I can introduce you to everyone." Kairi's voice rose with excitement and defiance. "Or we don't even have to go to the party. We can do whatever you want. Just come with me."

"Kairi I…"

"Scared?" Kairi smirked.

Roxas felt like throwing something at her.

"I'll hold your hand." She taunted.

This time he did throw something, the first thing he could reach which happened to be his pillow. Kairi shirked barely dodging out of the way.

Roxas fisted his hands, taking a sharp breath, irritated that Kairi had brought all this up in the first place. He didn't know what to do, he felt completely torn, lost, and at the same a rush of cold excitement.

Roxas felt his mattress dip and looked up. Kairi was perched on the edge of his bed on her hands and knees, leaning forward, grinning. "They'll never find out I promise and even if they do you know Dad will just blame it on me. Although he probably wouldn't do anything anyway." He was momentarily startled when she placed her cool hand on top his, gripping tightly. "I was being serious you know. I really will hold your hand."

He gripped back, returning her grin, not needing to think about it any further. "Let's go."

That had started everything.

He still hadn't been able to shake the dream and only a few days later, Kairi's voice still echoing through his head. "Hey Roxas, have you ever heard of the Jenova project?"

0o0o0o0

The next thing Roxas knew, he was staring at the water stained ceiling of a motel. A comforter had been thrown over him and he could feel the metal springs of the bed he was laying on digging into his back The place wasn't bad, it smelled musty and the gray paint from the walls was starting to flake apart but it wasn't bad.

It felt as if something had been lodged inside his chest, it was so hard to breathe, hard to move, he was burning hot, his hair matted with sweat, sticking to his forehead. He turned his head to the side, his eyes scanning everywhere in the room. "Axel…?" There was no answer, everything was silent. He was alone again.

He tried to push himself to sit up but his entire body was numb, his limbs feeling like lead and failing to respond. By the time he managed it he was gasping for air and his eyes were shut tightly to keep tears from leaking down his face. He nearly jumped when the door opened, letting in a cool burst of air then slamming shut. Axel's hand was clenched around a small paper bag that he threw onto a small T.V. stand. "You're awake." He stated, sounding somewhat surprised but Roxas could tell he was on edge.

"Seven," Axel said sharply, nearly shouting but he was mainly talking to himself, pacing the small expanse of the room. "I've been to seven pharmacies and none of them have a clue," Axel held up the capsule. "What this is."

Axel grabbed something out of the bag, making his way to the bathroom. There was the sound of the faucet running and then Axel was back, sitting on the edge of Roxas's bed, handing him the two remaining pills, "Take the rest of these."

Roxas placed them in his mouth as Axel held up a small paper cup of water, helping him hold it to keep it from spilling. He was able to swallow them without too much difficultly but immediately broke out into a coughing fit.

"You alright?" Axel asked. "There's a trashcan by the bed if…"

"I'm-I'm alright," Roxas said, swallowing back thick saliva, fighting the need to gag, and clutching at his shoulder until at last his breathing evened out. "I'm alright," He repeated.

"Good," Axel placed the cup somewhere out of his line of sight. "Open."

A thermometer was shoved into his mouth and Axel turned slightly away from him, resting his head in his hand. "Are you sure Cloud never said anything about what the pills were? He never let anything slip?"

"No, nothing." Roxas moved the thermometer more securely under his tongue, so it was easier to talk around it, then a sudden thought struck him like an electric jolt. "I used to hear voices."

Axel gave him a weary look."Voices?"

"They were like whispering and they…they kept running through my head. There were a few times I remember just laying awake with my hands over my ears. It didn't take my mom and Cloud long to figure out what was going on and that's when they stared giving me the pills. They made the voices stop."

"This is just…" Axel paused as if not knowing how to continue. "Really screwed up," He finished, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. "Did you ever try to stop taking them."

"Once when I was ten," Roxas answered. "Cloud or my mom always watched to make sure I took them but Kairi wanted to find out what would happen if I didn't. She told me to pretend to swallow them so I did. I didn't even make it through the night and I told my mom everything."

_He remembered standing at Tifa's and Cloud's door at three in the morning, he couldn't fall asleep and his hand was involuntary jerking on the doorknob. He opened it to discover Cloud wasn't there, meaning he either hadn't come home or was sleeping on the couch. Roxas was glad but not surprised. He focused solely on Tifa, curled onto her side, her hair fanned out on the pillow, looking lost in the too large bed and as if she was only a kid herself. She had worked a double shift at the bar and needed to get up in few hours to open, also saying something about an AVALANCHE meeting._

"_Mom." He called. Her eyes twitched but she didn't awaken, which was strange since she always slept like she was on guard, she could awake from the slightest sound, becoming fully alert at a moment's notice._

"_Mom." He called again, louder._

_She groaned, sitting up, blinking groggily at him for a few seconds and then rubbing at her eyes. "What is it sweetie? Can't sleep?"_

_He had nodded, told her what happened although he left Kairi's name out and then asked her if he was going to die._

_She looked halfway between shocked and guilty, extending an arm out to him. He'd climbed up on the bed laying his head on her shoulder, her arm coming around his back. "Why do you think you're going to die?"_

"_Because Cloud said" Roxas stated awkwardly. "That our parents died of heart failure and I've been taking the pills for so long and now everything feels strange so I thought since I didn't take them…"_

_Tifa shook her head, quick to reassure him. "Honey, you're not dying. The pills are just for extra safety. Even if you'd stopped taking them altogether…well it probably wouldn't be the best idea but you'd still be fine okay?"_

_They sat in silence for a few minutes before Tifa smiled, making her voice sound cheery when she was obviously fighting to keep her eyes open. "You know what I feel like?"_

"_What?"_

"_A banana split."_

"_Now?"_

_Tifa got up from off the bed. "Sure, why not. C'mon we'll make the girls jealous."_

_Two hours later, they were sitting at the kitchen table with discarded ice cream bowls and in their fifth game of checkers when Cloud came back, heading toward the cabinet to pull out a granola bar. He just raised an eyebrow at them. "What-"_

"_I need to talk to you." Tifa cut him off evenly, pointing to the next room._

_Cloud nodded, followed her and Roxas tapped absently at a checker, preparing himself for the arguing that would follow or it really wasn't arguing so much as Tifa going off on Cloud for not calling and other things that made little sense to Roxas. Cloud would either take it or brush her off completely, then Tifa would later apologize for everything. It was like a routine that happened nearly every night, when they thought he was asleep, only he was wasn't, he and Kairi never were. Naminé he wasn't sure. A few times he had even woken up to Cloud's low and stifled screaming as if he was in pain. He hadn't heard it so much recently, more when he was younger. He'd been afraid to ask about it but Kairi hadn't been and she told him Tifa said it was from nightmares. Roxas never wanted to know anything more. _

_Only there was near silence except for the soft buzz of voices and Cloud came back a few minutes later without Tifa. Roxas blinked up at him. "Where's mom?"_

"_She went back to bed."_

_Roxas instantly felt guilty. "Oh."_

_Cloud crossed his arms, leaning against the counter. "Tired yet?"_

_Roxas glanced back down at the checker, spinning it across the table. "Not really."_

"_Want to go for a ride?"_

"_Ride?"_

"_On the motorcycle," Cloud clarified. "There should be something opened by now."_

_Roxas smiled faintly. "Yeah, I guess."_

_They drove around for awhile, gotten breakfast, and drove back. It really wasn't that exciting but he'd finally been able to fall asleep._

"What did she say?" Axel's voice pulled him out of the memory.

"Nothing, much. She said I didn't have to worry about it. I think she lied." Roxas's eyes widened, a new thought forming in his head. "Hey wait! Cloud went through something like this. He was missing for a long time. The first time I met him I was five before then it was only Mom, Kairi, Naminé, and me. Mom would talk about him constantly, say he was always going to come back. Then one day he just showed up out of nowhere. I didn't really know enough to think it was strange at the time but I guess…it was strange, okay really strange and Cloud was sick for awhile afterwards. I think Mom said it was because he was getting over Mako poisoning."

"Mako poisoning? Where was he?"

"I'm not sure. I don't even think Mom knows all of it." Roxas bit down on his lip, trying to keep his voice from hitching. "Do you think maybe I have Mako-"

"If you did Rox," Axel said dismissively. "You'd be in a coma."

Roxas winced, feeling a wave of heat tear through his muscles, felt them begin to twitch again as they refused to hold him up any longer. He let himself fall back down onto the bed. He curled onto his side as much as he was able, trying to focus on breathing. The weight in chest felt as if it had just twisted. "Right."

"Here." Axel held his hand out for the thermometer.

Roxas handed it to him, watching as Axel turned it over, scrunching his eyes together, frowning. "Is it bad?"

"Yeah…" Axel trailed off. "It's bad."

Roxas wasn't able to form a reply, pain shooting to every nerve in his body, he fisted his hands, needing some sort of anchor, fighting for breath, gagging at the same time and when it finally subsided it felt like gravity had knotted around him. He wasn't even sure if could move a finger. He shut his eyes against hot tears and the pounding in his skull, desperately wanting to pass out. "Axel wha-what's wrong with me."

Axel didn't answer him, turning his head to stare at a wall. His face was blank and his eyes void, looking miserably defeated, just sitting there, silent, his hand curling into his torn jeans before he turned back to him, taking in a deep breath. "Roxas, I'm going to take you to a hospital."

"You can't!" Roxas shouted, pure terror momentarily overriding the pain. "No hospitals. He'll find me. Everything we've done, everything we've been through it will all be for nothing!"

"It's just for over night he won't find-"

"You don't know Cloud!"

"Than what do you want me to do Roxas?!" Axel lashed out. "Whatever's wrong with you is beyond me. I can't deal with it and we can't keep going like this!" He took a breath, placing a hand on Roxas's shoulder, continuing softer. "Listen to me, I'll check you in for the night and we'll leave first thing in the morning. He won't be able to find us from one night. Nothing will happen I promise."

Roxas looked up at him through hollowed eyes. "I want to talk to Kairi."

"Alright, sure" Axel agreed without hesitation. "As soon as we leave in the morning."

Roxas expected Axel to say no. He'd forgotten how many times he asked and each time the redhead had replied it was too dangerous. There had to be a reason for the change, something more then just trying to get him to go to the hospital, something Roxas was missing but his head was nothing more then a jumbled mess. He wanted to talk to Kairi badly, to make sure she was okay, to hear her voice, they'd never been separated before and he knew Axel was right, they couldn't keep going like this. Roxas told himself he could hang on and he knew he could, do whatever it took, but he was desperate to make the pain stop. He could trust Axel the redhead had came back for him at the restaurant just like he said he would and it was for one night, only for one night. He nodded. "Okay, but just for the night."

Axel didn't say anything, taking his arm, shifting him, lifting him painfully back into his arms. Roxas's head resting lifeless against Axel's collarbone.

"There's something I've been wondering." Axel said as he slowly made his way toward the door. Roxas could feel the low vibrating on his voice underneath his ear. "Who actually went through with taking the one hundred grand, you or Kairi?"

"Kairi," Roxas answered. "But I covered for her. It was a lot easier then I thought it would be. We were just there and she went inside and when she came back she had it. No one even knew we did anything. Then we just ran."

Really everything had been Kairi's idea. They had planned to run together and Kairi had done research, made outline after outline that they spent weeks in her room going over. Then when it finally happened Kairi had reversed everything, introduced him to Axel, gave Axel the money. She said it would be easier this way, less risky, but don't worry because they were still meeting outside of Midgar. "You know the rest."

"Yeah," Axel opened the door, shifting Roxas closer against his chest, his voice oddly somber. "Guess I do."

Roxas closed his eyes, everything falling into blissful unconsciousness.

0o0o0o0

Roxas woke up to the sound of a steady beeping, his eyes slowly focusing. He was in a nearly all white room. The air tasted stale and there was a smell of something between cough syrup and window cleaner. Becoming more aware, he could feel needles tapped against his skin, something in his nose. He lifted a hand to his face before a fat grubby hand caught his own. "Don't touch it. It's a breathing tube."

A small women was before him, Roxas guessed must have been a nurse. "Someone just arrived here a few minutes ago for you." She said swiftly before leaving. "I'll go get them. Hang tight."

Roxas soon realized he wasn't in anymore pain. Everything was gone, the nausea, the headache, the burning fever, everything. He experimentally flexed his arms and legs, finding his muscles were still a little bit stiff and sore, and there was a slight sting from the needles, but it was nothing he couldn't handle. In fact he felt better then alright, his vision seemed strangely sharper and clearer, he could breathe easier, he wanted to get up, wanted to move. They needed to leave soon anyway, he and Axel were only wasting time like this.

With a rush of relief and excitement Roxas turned his head to side, trying to get a better feel for the room he was in, what he saw made him freeze, made him stop breathing altogether. A boy who looked about the same age he was, was lying in the next bed, partially hidden by a white curtain, with spiky brown hair that looked to go in every direction. There weren't any tubes attached to him or any medical equipment at all that he could see, his breathing was soft, eyes shut lightly.

Roxas felt a sickening sense of familiarity, leaving him cold and shaken. "Sora…" He whispered. He didn't know where the name had come from, he'd never seen the boy before in his life. He shouldn't have known it and yet somehow he did. An image flashed behind his eyes.

_He was in a glowing blue and white room over looking a pod, the brown haired boy floating peacefully inside. Roxas didn't want to be there, he didn't want to die but things had happened and now they both couldn't exist at the same time. As much as he wanted to run he couldn't turn away. He took a step forward because this was fate and you couldn't outrun fate. "You're lucky. Looks like my summer vacation is…over."_

Before Roxas even knew what happened he found himself staring back at a sheet on the hospital bed, the image broken by the sound of heavy footsteps, someone coming into the room. He looked up, toward the doorway. He froze in sheer panic, his stomach twisting, his heart jumping into his throat. "Cloud…"

0o0o0o0

Sorry for the wait guys. I'm still working on this and on Inseparable too if anyone's reading that. Thank you so so much for the reviews. I have a better idea of where I want to go with this story and I went back and changed some things in chapter one. Like I'm using FFVII geography and Roxas is sixteen not fifteen because if he was fifteen the rest of the story wouldn't make any sense. And sorry for all the flashback scenes but there's still going to be a lot more coming.

Thanks for reading.


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